Soon we will need programs and instructional videos for other basic things we can't control.
Muscle confusion. When my muscles get confused I get them a tutor, its called dedication. I learned it when I was fourteen doing push-ups in my bedroom. I learned what doing more of them did, and I learned what doing them every day did. Seeing your body change because of exercise is one of the coolest things out there, and even today, my body looks different when I’m doing yoga every day, and it looks a specific way when I’m running every day. See a pattern? Every day exercise causes a certain effect-change. Your body and muscles change. Lifting weights on a rigid daily schedule will help your muscles grow, helping you get huge. Push-ups and pull-ups and sit-ups every day will help you get you get solid. Yoga every day will help you get lean. All of them every day? Well that sounds like a great workout plan-a perfect one. It sounds like P90X, and it also sounds like Power 90. It’s a simple and stupid concept, almost as stupid as the people buying it.
I can say that without equivocation. Stupid people. People dumb enough to already know and see how exercise works, let their bodies get out of control, finally gain the nerve to take serious action, and follow a program that breaks down how exercise works. Its like walking into your bathroom and watching a video about brushing your teeth because you’ve taken three years off from brushing your teeth because other things were more important. Exercise is basic, and free. Attempting exercise every day for ninety days will get you into the best shape of your life. I mean every day.
That’s the P90X guarantee. Do it for ninety days, see results, or your money back. What if your life was on the line, would you be able to exercise every day for ninety days to save your life in some sort of “fit to the death” contest? I don’t think so, but for Americans, paying money delivers that type of motivation. More than threats, depression, terrible things the doctor might say and clothes we can’t fit, monetary commitments force us to do things we otherwise wouldn’t for any other reason. What, with all the cupcakes, couches, jeans with elastic waistbands and people who will accept us for the fat sloths we are, why do it for any other reason other than a return on investment? Investing our money is the only thing that will get us to even try to fix the ways our bodies look.
It seems to be our mentality: “I’ve paid the money, so now it works for me.” We do it to our children with tutoring and lessons, we do it with household appliances, and we do it with our bodies. The only problem is that we can get conned into making any investment if the need has battered us emotionally. So after we’re depressed about our kids failing in school or a belly that hides our feet in the shower, our first impulse isn’t to take personal action, its to pay a professional who laughs all the way to the bank. I’ve got no problems with this because sometimes the professionals know more than us. Buying the solution from an info-mercial though, is a backwards way to approach this process.
Obviously, the Beachbody company has tightened the reins on this info-mercial industry. Their products take real exercise and gear it toward the parts of the American psyche that dreams all day about looking good. They make the exercise so simple that nothing ever has to be done correctly, making people much more comfortable than they would be with say, a personal trainer who would encourage them to bring integrity to the exercises so they see lasting results. If you’ve ever seen one of their info-mercials, they look silly and cheesy. You know what looks sillier? Seeing the people actually do the programs. Seeing them writhing through movements incorrectly and holding postures half-way would make a fitness conservative cringe.
Beachbody's aim: "People are going to shell out millions to try to look like these models in booty shorts and shirtless personal trainers." But no, they're not just selling superficiality to America, right?
This is if you even try it, because most people don’t get past the first week. Exercising every day, trying to “confuse” your muscles, is difficult when you just haven’t, ever. As a person who has set out on their own to get some form of exercise every day for years now, It’s easy for me, but for a person who has paid the money, cleared the space, and is ready to start, how do they build the motivation to do it every day? Oh, right, they remember that this cost them money. What they refuse to understand is that this is an insanely liberal practice. Only the true liberals in our society can understand the backward notion that a monetary investment can fix problems that we need to tend to personally. No system, method, or philosophy can build the personal determination to really fix these sorts of problems. By handling the important things in our lives like conservatives, we can build the focus and control to fix these problems ourselves.
Think I’m wrong? I’m only telling you what runners, yogis, and athletes are doing. People who understand how fitness works and seek it out properly think that it’s simply crazy to do things to replace exercise, or challenge yourself to be disciplined for ninety days, or to do anything just to see results. People like us know results, we’re not waiting to see them. People like us eat right because it helps us exercise better, fitness liberals eat right because they’ve “heard this is healthy.” I’m a fitness conservative, which has nothing to do with my political views, the politics of ME are far more important to me. If you’re a fitness liberal, remember that P90X won’t directly overhaul your personal system of indulgence, envy, and scrambling to get skinny. It’s a negative cause, trying to look good. Even worse when you’re trying to pay for it. If you know how exercise works, turn off your television, leave your home, and go seek it out.
