If I don’t believe that fitness is about superficiality, then I shouldn’t always cite superficial reasons to make important decisions right? In our country, ability and qualifications should outshine looks, but they rarely do. In a culture where most contests are really tests of beauty, popularity or both, I’ve always shied away from making decisions about others based on first impressions, pre-conceived bias, or simply aesthetic discrimination. There is though, one area where bias is prevalent in my heart: I won’t be led by a fat person. I like my coaches, bosses, and politicians to be in full control of their bodies. I don’t believe that an individual who has lost control of their own body is fit to lead others in any capacity, and it’s why I can barely even hear the name of New Jersey Governor Chris Christie without imagining scores of overweight Americans flocking to the polls to vote for “their guy.”
Mr. Christie has been the Governor of New Jersey for nearly two years, and in that time, he’s set out to clean up many of the political messes in the state. He’s also gained a great deal of recognition around the country as a possible Republican presidential candidate in 2012, a quest he vehemently denies. Now that Barack Obama has puffed his chest in boasting over his overseeing the mission to kill Osama bin Laden, Republicans, already viewing the incumbent President as “unbeatable” have clamored for Mr. Christie to run in 2012. Unfortunately for Mr. Christie, no matter what his policies are, he will never get my vote. Mr. Christie is a fat man. He is a combination between William Howard Taft and Philadelphia Eagles coach Andy Reid. He is so fat, that he’s too fat to be trusted. He’s so fat, that he could only lead people into a situation where they are fatter. He is so fat, that he’ll be an awful example to children on how to live their lives. He will not be a man who is a champion of self-discipline. Even Mr. Obama, a cigarette smoker needed to go to great lengths to downplay his smoking and highlight his basketball playing. The First Lady, Michelle Obama needed an entire health and fitness campaign to simply show this administrations dedication to the issue. In the world’s fattest, laziest, most undisciplined country, it was necessary in 2008 that voters saw a candidate who had an air of self-control. If even one individual chooses to vote for Mr. Christie, it will display our most dirty American secret, that we are undisciplined because we are endeared by the undisciplined.
We love Charles Barkley, his huge gut, his bad golf swing, and his huge mouth. We love other flawed celebrities for many other reasons. Voters love Mr. Christie for many of the same reasons. Americans on a whole have this backward notion that the more regular a prominent individual is, and hence the more like the common man they are, the more accepted they should be. The phrase “down-to-earth” is to me, indicative of an individual who desperately needs to connect with people who won’t ever be in their position. How does a person in a prominent position though, simply flip a switch to be accepted in higher circles? They don’t. In our society the ignorant, the overweight, the unattractive are always searching for traces of their personalities in our leaders, and it allows for politicians like Mr. Christie to appeal to the common man who is afraid to ever change and be better. Mr. Christie is so fat that he is literally down-to-earth. If he runs and is elected, he will directly embody the current American spirit: Here, we care about the issues, not ourselves. God forbid that someone might suggest that care for ourselves would permanently fix a few of the issues, that person might be ousted from the public eye.
If John F. Kennedy were elected today, and preached from the podium to “ask not what your country can do for you, but ask what you can do for your country” to our lazy and undisciplined masses, he’d probably be shunned by his own party and lamented by the libertarian Tea Party Movement. Its just the culture we’ve come to know. We want to get fatter, dumber and protect issues we don’t really understand. Even more a part of our culture is the idea that an individual who thinks like us and shares our weaknesses is fit to lead us. Well, if voters will not vote for those who commit adultery or steal from the government even though many Americans do, then I will not be led by a fat person. I believe that an overweight body, one like Mr. Christie’s is proof of poor sensory decisions with food and exercise within his own mind, and I’d be quite afraid of other poor sensory decisions he’d make if he’s been so personally reckless.